Leadership Post : Management and Intergenerational Leadership Coaching, Employee Engagement, and Performance Management Training

“Know Thyself” – Oracle at Delphi

One of my favorite sections to read in the New York Times on Sunday is Adam Bryant’s Corner Office. Each Sunday there is a condensed version of an interview with a CEO talking about leadership.

This weekend’s interview was with Rachel Ashwell, founder of Shabby Chic, and he asked her a great question, “What would your employees say you’re like as a boss?”

Ms. Ashwell had no trouble articulating what she thought they would say but the question is how accurate is she?

The research is pretty clear on this according to research by Lombardo and Eichinger - The Leadership Machine. Self-rating is less accurate than all other rater groups. Actually, most people rate themselves higher than others do. This is understandable as it is difficult to be an unbiased observer of yourself.

So what is a leader to do to meet the challenge of “Know thyself,” the description over the Oracle at Delphi. The answer is simple - ask for feedback. For many CEO’s this can be a humbling experience but also a growth opportunity.

It can get pretty lonely at the top and it’s easy for a leader to become isolated and cut off from how their behavior is helping or hindering the troops.

Until you truly know yourself, your strengths and weaknesses, underdeveloped areas that need bolstering and what you stand for you cannot be a truly authentic and effective leader.

Here are six things a leader can do to increase self-awareness and effectiveness:

1. Create a feedback loop by having your HR department or preferably an outside consultant conduct a yearly evaluation of you by your team, have them write it up and debrief you. Depending on the level of trust, which will increase over time, this can be anonymous or attributed.

2. Let your team know how important this is to you and that you welcome negative feedback and criticism. This may sound scary but in my experience leaders who do this are held in higher esteem and respected more by their followers.

3. Rather than using a 360 instrument to gather feedback (I’m not a big fan of them) one-on-one interviews should be conducted with each rater, which can help go beyond general awareness and cover a deep level of understanding with specific behavioral examples.

4. Keep it simple - as my colleague Marc Effron former head of talent management at Avon would say - by asking four key questions and then probing for specific behavioral examples:

A. What does Ms. CEO do that they should continue to do?
B. What can Ms. CEO do that could be more effective?
C. What does Ms. CEO do that should be stopped?
D. What does Ms. CEO do that helps/hinders the organization to move forward?

In A through C, you are probing for behavioral examples. For instance, one executive I coached who was extremely impatient found out that he had a tendency to stifle constructive debate by cutting off discussions and coming to a premature decision. Upon hearing this, he was able to be more Socratic. D has to do with business issues.

5. After receiving the feedback, thank your raters and share the two to three themes that came from the feedback. Let them know that you heard what they said and that you plan on working on modifying your behavior so you can be more effective and ultimately help them to be more effective. Ask them for additional suggestions on how you can improve.

6. Behavior change is extremely difficult so give yourself time and don’t get discouraged. Keep in mind that under stress, it is easy to revert back to your “default” style. Monitor your progress and continue to show your commitment to the process by having informal check-in with your team throughout the year.

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Tammy Erickson’s post in Harvard Business Review’s blog “Career Advice for Generation X” raises some interesting observations about career challenges facing this generation which she further explores in her insightful book, “What’s Next, Gen X? Keeping Up, Moving Ahead, and Getting the Career You Want.”

You’re Generation X. You’re in your 30’s and 40’s, in the middle of your lives, your careers, and the workforce. You’re wedged between two groups of people who are, in their own ways, taking up a little too much of your room. Boomers to the left of you, Gen Y to the right – and you with all the frustrations that come with being part of a smarter generational cohort.

I agree with Ms. Erickson that even though they face challenges, Gen X has strengths that companies need to flourish. The first generation to grow up with mothers who worked, they were left to their own devices and thus are resilient, self-motivated, hard working and also fiercely independent.

It’s this fierce independence that is a liability for them. Known as “loners” - which they readily admit to - their mantra is, “Just tell me what you want and when and then leave me alone to do it.” This flies in the face of everything Gen Y, who they manage, needs to be engaged.

Gen X As Managers of Gen Y

The most child centric generation to be raised in our history, Gen Y wants to have a relationship with their manager, someone who can give them daily feedback, coach and develop them, tell them what to do and give them all the information they need to get the work done. This does not mesh with Gen X’s love of independence and hands-off style of management.
I think you see the problem here.

More Challenges for Gen X

The economic downturn in the 90’s also saw huge cutbacks in management and leadership development programs as well as the flattening of organizations. So not only was Gen X not shown the ‘welcome mat’ when they entered the workforce, they also did not receive the development that their Boomer parents received. The flattening of organizations also added to their lack of development in that there were fewer people to learn from – advantages that Boomers received.

A Call For Action

Gen X, as well as the companies they work for, are both facing challenges. The inevitable exit of the Boomers and the small number of Xers will leave a gaping hole in the management and leadership ranks in many organizations. Gen X is perfectly positioned to take the reins from the Boomers – at long last!

In response to Ms. Erickson’s question, how does Gen X reset their sights for the next stretch? 

Gen X must first

Understand what makes Gen Y tick and be able to tap into how to engage and motivate them.

I’ve talked to and trained many Gen Xers and they are clueless. Gen X - I’m not blaming you. I’m calling out your companies for not providing both the generational awareness and basic management 101 training you need to effectively manage and lead.

You’ll hear me talk a lot on this topic so stay tuned.
 

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